Children's Book Awards Halifax Central Library

I spent an awesome day at Halifax Central Library yesterday - meeting some fantastic authors (Polly Ho-Yen, Gill Lewis and Nikki Sheehan) and lots of brill kids. We got to make up some fun poetry (rather disgusting some of it was too - the phrase of the day was the description some boys though up for Marmite - The Devil's Daily Spread!) and also listen to the authors talking about their writing, how they write, why they write, etc.

Here's one of the poems that was written by Ella and Isobella. Sorry, girls, I'm not sure which school you are from, but it was a great poem all the same...

Thanks to all the amazing staff at the library. And well done Polly for claiming the prize of best book (I knew you would - it really is a great book).

Brilliant Britannia!

This must be the quickest I've ever posted about a day at a school! I've literally just come in through my front door (after a LOT of traffic on the M62 - ugh), and sat down to write about my day at Britannia Bridge Primary School in Wigan. My first EVER Wigan school. I had a new accent to get used to - as did the children!

Words I noticed that are pronounced differently in Wigan as opposed to Wakefield (where I'm from...)

I say 'stairs'
Wigan children say 'sturs'
I say 'unawares'
Wigan children say 'unawurs'
I say 'book'
Wigan children say 'booooooooooook'


But that's all part of the rich tapestry of language that this country is made up of. I love travelling about and hearing different accents. And it's been a lovely day at Britannia (where, I'm glad to report, there is SOME West Yorkshire influence - Mr D, the head teacher, is orignally from Leeds!). I was privileged to work all day in the brand new library that school have sorted for the children - lots of lovely books on the shelves, punctuation themed seats (!), and a regular flow of giddy and enthusiastic children coming to visit me to listen to my poems and stories. They were brilliant (the children, that is - though I hope the poems and stories were ok too?!), and seemed to love spending some time in the new library.

We did lots of different things, from finding out about a naughty magpie, to shouting at the Wind, doing tongue twisters, learning and performing poems, and telling a rather spooky story (and boy, did Year 6 jump at that one!).

I was also EXTREMELY pleased to be given a brand new poem, based on one of my poems - The Biscuit Burglar - in my latest book of poems. Thank you so much Ellise - here is your poem for everyone to enjoy...

Sorry it's not the right way up, but I just cannot seem to get it to do what I want. Computers, eh?!!! You're better off sticking with books.

I also received a lovely thank you note from some children...

Which, for some reason, has come out the right way?!!!!!!

One more thing that was VERY exciting was that school decided to purchase one of my books for each child in school. So as I drove away at the end of the day, I could see Britannia Bridge children all over the place with their noses buried in one of my books - that was a great image and I hope that everyone enjoys reading my poems. 

So a big thank you to ALL the staff, ALL the children, and especially the two BRILLIANT librarians who have helped me to have a great day. I loved it!

Shall we do it all again sometime?!!!

Aston Primary

 I love my job. I like just about every school that I go to. But some schools I really, REALLY like. And Aston Primary School at the bottom end of Sheffield is definitely one that I really really like. It felt a little like my own primary school, home of my happiest school memories. Add to that a bunch of brilliant children, happy, friendly staff, and a staffroom full of home made scones with jam, and I knew pretty soon that I was going to have a fab two days there.

And I did. We did so many different things! We made up a new legend about the Dragon of Filey Brigg (who, apparently, loved eating Grannies - poor Grannies!), a story about a spider called Stampy who'd lost his webb, and many and varied poems from seaside creatures, to rockets, to quiet countrysides with grumpy teenagers, and World War 2 evacuees. Not to mention a story about a magpie stealing shiny things. It was just great and I came away after the assembly at the end of day two feeling that I'd been somewhere pretty special. 

One of my highlights was walking into Year 4 and seeing a poem written on the board that they'd just cooked up in a mere 10 minutes. Here it is...

Conrad Burger King

Will he teach us anything?

We love poems, we love rhymes

Listening to them, lots of times

But we’ve got questions

Stuff we’d like to know

Like what started your passion?

What makes the ideas flow?

Did you fall in love with poetry at school?

Who inspired you and made it cool?

Did your teacher pick her nose?

Or one worse…bite her toes?

Which is the favourite poem of yours?

Did you have a teacher locked in loo doors?

Did you see a hand,

Moving in the sand?

Did your teachers have a bogey fight?

If our teachers did, it would give us a fright!

Have you got a sister?

And is she a blister?

Do you think you’ll ever stop

Writing poetry…or will your brain pop?!

With all the ideas spilling out of your head?

Best keep writing your books instead!

Did I teach them anything? Well, I hope that I taught them that poetry and stories are fun, that they are not too difficult to create, and that in the creating there is a great deal of joy. I think I might also have taught the staff not to put fresh food in front of me if they want to have any themselves!

As a thank you to the children in Y4, I wrote them the following poem...

Beware the Grumpy Teenager

Beware the grumpy teenager

In the countryside

Quickly go and run away

Quickly go and hide

Beware the grumpy teenager

With the mardy face

Moaning, groaning

Staring into space

Beware the grumpy teenager

Wishing for his phone

Can you hear him grumbling?
Can you hear him groan?

Beware the grumpy teenager

Asking for the loo

Beware the grumpy teenager - 

SOON IT WILL BE YOU!

I was also incredibly impressed with the displays around school and the level of handwriting. These children write calligraphy style - it's the first and only time I've ever seen this at a school and the effects are stunning. The artwork is unbelievably good - the whole place is just a joy to be in. 

Here's hoping I can come back sometime for some more poetry / storytelling / writing fun. 

Thank you everyone at Aston, you made me feel extremely welcome.

Hawthorn Primary School

If you ever want to start the day with a good old laugh, I would recommend spending five minutes in the reception area of Hawthorn Primary School in Birmingham just before school starts. That was where I was yesterday and it was hilarious! First, one boy came in with his mum shaking out a very wet looking lunchbox. Seems his juice had exploded at the sight of his sandwiches, leaving a soggy, damp mess swishing around in there. That was followed shortly after by a great little sketch...

Brother 1: Mum, mum, he's got different trainers on!
Mum:        What?
Brother 1: He's got different trainers on! Honestly, he has!
Mum:       Go and get him.

Brother 1 runs off, returning shortly after with little brother in tow...Mum looks at little brother's feet where he has evidently got one new shoe and one old one on.

Mum:  Oh my word, he has! How've you done that?

Conrad starts to laugh. Mum turns to him.

Mum:  I bought him new shoes in the holidays, but they're just like his old ones. Oh how has he managed to do that?
Little brother:  Look! One's shiny...and one isn't.

It was great. Really a nice way to start the day. I was helping the children begin their poetry week, and it was a fab day. After an assembly (where I nearly knocked myself out on the low door frame  - something I had to look out for throughout school as it didn't appear to have been made for those of us who stand at 6ft 2!) of poetry, I moved to each class helping the children come up with brand new poems. Being a BSL (British Sign Language) school, the actions for many of the poems were ready made. I now know how to sign 'fantastic' (fist into palm with thumb sticking up), thank you (palm from chin outwards towards the person you're thanking) and some other words too.

The teachers were brill - really involved and quite obviously extremely fond of their classes. Everyone made me feel welcome and appreciated, and it was a happy day. Here are a couple of the poems that were made yesterday by the children...

Dad's Pants

My dad's got horrid undies
They're big and vibrant pink
But worse than that, you see,
His undies really stink!

They smell like rotten cabbage
His undies sure are grim
My mum keeps trying to hide them
In the garbage bin

I give my nasty neighbour
Dad's disgusting pants
Then watch him turn bright green
And quickly move to France!

Written by Y3


Crocodile in the Loo

Don't go into the toilets
Don't go into the loo
There's something hiding there
Waiting just for you

He has got sharp teeth
And a massive belly
It goes wibble wobble
Like a bright green jelly

He has great big eyes
Staring straight at me
I want to run away
I cannot do a wee

I turn around and scream
I really want my mum
The crocodile gets me
And bites me on my bum!

Written by Y1


Aren't they brilliant? And then, right at the end of the day, I was given this by Humzah in Y3. What a poet!!!!


My house is
Amazing
Amazing as you
There's a place for
privacy
A bath tub too
A place to sleep,
Quietly,
well that's a bed.
A lovely tiled kitchen
Full of sweets
and bread
My garden's full of flowers
A swing and slide too
A place to play
Football
Basket ball
too!

By Humzah.

Fantastic! There were some brill drawings to go with the poem, but my phone doesn't want to load them up for some reason.

Thanks to everyone involved in the day - hopefully I'll see you again sometime.

Conrad