This is Rob Bullock - he came to Alice, Violet and Mabel's school last summer and they LOVED his visit. They all came home desperate to write stories that he'd inspired. Here's what Rob has to say about himself...

Children's Author Robert Bullock (author of seven books including the best selling Jacob’s War) is currently working on books about the Romans and World War One. He visits schools, libraries and community groups up and down the country taking interactive author workshops with children from Early Years to Year 6. Workshops include drama & creative writing sessions for WW2, WW1, Roman Britain, Vikings, Titanic, Ancient Egypt, Science Fiction, Pirates & Dinosaurs!  The workshops encompass Literacy, History and Citizenship from the National Curriculum. Please see his website and blog at www.ninnylizard.com.

The Vale Primary Academy

My first time ever at The Vale Primary Academy in Knottingley, and what a lovely visit it was! Best bit of the day- having my own, personalised car parking space! Well...not strictly the BEST bit of my day, but a very nice way to start!

I worked with Y4,5, and 6 today, and they were awesome. I was teaching them about performance poetry and they picked it up no problem at all. Not only that, but each class devised and created a brand new performance poem each.

Year 4's was one entitled 'My Pet Shark' and went from being almost eaten by a Shark, to it turning into our friendly pet!

Year 5 wanted to write about a Platypus (?!!!), and ended up with a whole host of verses all about different animals that had escaped from the zoo in London, and the chaos they had caused. Birds pooing on the Queen's dress and shoes was my favourite bit - especially the bum wiggle to signify a bird doing its business. Brilliant!

Year 6 created a poem about a guy called Dustbin Drake (or was he actually a dustbin? Who knows? Does it matter? Certainly doesn't!). I learned a new word - 'scarfing down' for 'scoffing down'. I also found out that a baby's nappy is full of 'Piccalilli poo' (think of the colour...!).

So thank you everyone for a fab day. And I'll see you all on Wednesday (Ks1 and Y3 that day) before the final performances on Friday morning.

Fab!

SUPERSONIC GRAN IS HERE!!!

She's landed! She's here! Get ready! Book number four is out!!!

If you want a copy, just email me at conrad.burdekin@sky.com  If you want two, great. If you want 102, even better!

I'm reallay happy with this book - the cover is my favourite so far. Thanks to Lilian (my illustrator) and David (my designer, printer, organiser etc.etc.!).

My Gran is rocket powered

Her bottom sure is chronic

She flies so fast it's made the news

My Gran is Super - SONIC!

IN THE NEWS!

So...I've made it into Bradford's Telegraph and Argus newspaper. A really big spread, and some lovely photographs. But I'm not sure about the quality of the writing. I've been made to sound rather dense, and some of the sentences leave a little bit to be desired! But hey ho! Never mind!

What is rather bizarre is that it was in the September 1st edition...I actually went to Hill Top to do the day back in February!!!!!

Anyway, here's the link...

http://www.thetelegraphandargus.co.uk/education/education_news/13639212.Father_takes_inspiration_from_his_little_ones_to_make_poetry_fun_for_children/?ref=mac

Enjoy!

Children's Book Awards Halifax Central Library

I spent an awesome day at Halifax Central Library yesterday - meeting some fantastic authors (Polly Ho-Yen, Gill Lewis and Nikki Sheehan) and lots of brill kids. We got to make up some fun poetry (rather disgusting some of it was too - the phrase of the day was the description some boys though up for Marmite - The Devil's Daily Spread!) and also listen to the authors talking about their writing, how they write, why they write, etc.

Here's one of the poems that was written by Ella and Isobella. Sorry, girls, I'm not sure which school you are from, but it was a great poem all the same...

Thanks to all the amazing staff at the library. And well done Polly for claiming the prize of best book (I knew you would - it really is a great book).

Brilliant Britannia!

This must be the quickest I've ever posted about a day at a school! I've literally just come in through my front door (after a LOT of traffic on the M62 - ugh), and sat down to write about my day at Britannia Bridge Primary School in Wigan. My first EVER Wigan school. I had a new accent to get used to - as did the children!

Words I noticed that are pronounced differently in Wigan as opposed to Wakefield (where I'm from...)

I say 'stairs'
Wigan children say 'sturs'
I say 'unawares'
Wigan children say 'unawurs'
I say 'book'
Wigan children say 'booooooooooook'


But that's all part of the rich tapestry of language that this country is made up of. I love travelling about and hearing different accents. And it's been a lovely day at Britannia (where, I'm glad to report, there is SOME West Yorkshire influence - Mr D, the head teacher, is orignally from Leeds!). I was privileged to work all day in the brand new library that school have sorted for the children - lots of lovely books on the shelves, punctuation themed seats (!), and a regular flow of giddy and enthusiastic children coming to visit me to listen to my poems and stories. They were brilliant (the children, that is - though I hope the poems and stories were ok too?!), and seemed to love spending some time in the new library.

We did lots of different things, from finding out about a naughty magpie, to shouting at the Wind, doing tongue twisters, learning and performing poems, and telling a rather spooky story (and boy, did Year 6 jump at that one!).

I was also EXTREMELY pleased to be given a brand new poem, based on one of my poems - The Biscuit Burglar - in my latest book of poems. Thank you so much Ellise - here is your poem for everyone to enjoy...

Sorry it's not the right way up, but I just cannot seem to get it to do what I want. Computers, eh?!!! You're better off sticking with books.

I also received a lovely thank you note from some children...

Which, for some reason, has come out the right way?!!!!!!

One more thing that was VERY exciting was that school decided to purchase one of my books for each child in school. So as I drove away at the end of the day, I could see Britannia Bridge children all over the place with their noses buried in one of my books - that was a great image and I hope that everyone enjoys reading my poems. 

So a big thank you to ALL the staff, ALL the children, and especially the two BRILLIANT librarians who have helped me to have a great day. I loved it!

Shall we do it all again sometime?!!!

Aston Primary

 I love my job. I like just about every school that I go to. But some schools I really, REALLY like. And Aston Primary School at the bottom end of Sheffield is definitely one that I really really like. It felt a little like my own primary school, home of my happiest school memories. Add to that a bunch of brilliant children, happy, friendly staff, and a staffroom full of home made scones with jam, and I knew pretty soon that I was going to have a fab two days there.

And I did. We did so many different things! We made up a new legend about the Dragon of Filey Brigg (who, apparently, loved eating Grannies - poor Grannies!), a story about a spider called Stampy who'd lost his webb, and many and varied poems from seaside creatures, to rockets, to quiet countrysides with grumpy teenagers, and World War 2 evacuees. Not to mention a story about a magpie stealing shiny things. It was just great and I came away after the assembly at the end of day two feeling that I'd been somewhere pretty special. 

One of my highlights was walking into Year 4 and seeing a poem written on the board that they'd just cooked up in a mere 10 minutes. Here it is...

Conrad Burger King

Will he teach us anything?

We love poems, we love rhymes

Listening to them, lots of times

But we’ve got questions

Stuff we’d like to know

Like what started your passion?

What makes the ideas flow?

Did you fall in love with poetry at school?

Who inspired you and made it cool?

Did your teacher pick her nose?

Or one worse…bite her toes?

Which is the favourite poem of yours?

Did you have a teacher locked in loo doors?

Did you see a hand,

Moving in the sand?

Did your teachers have a bogey fight?

If our teachers did, it would give us a fright!

Have you got a sister?

And is she a blister?

Do you think you’ll ever stop

Writing poetry…or will your brain pop?!

With all the ideas spilling out of your head?

Best keep writing your books instead!

Did I teach them anything? Well, I hope that I taught them that poetry and stories are fun, that they are not too difficult to create, and that in the creating there is a great deal of joy. I think I might also have taught the staff not to put fresh food in front of me if they want to have any themselves!

As a thank you to the children in Y4, I wrote them the following poem...

Beware the Grumpy Teenager

Beware the grumpy teenager

In the countryside

Quickly go and run away

Quickly go and hide

Beware the grumpy teenager

With the mardy face

Moaning, groaning

Staring into space

Beware the grumpy teenager

Wishing for his phone

Can you hear him grumbling?
Can you hear him groan?

Beware the grumpy teenager

Asking for the loo

Beware the grumpy teenager - 

SOON IT WILL BE YOU!

I was also incredibly impressed with the displays around school and the level of handwriting. These children write calligraphy style - it's the first and only time I've ever seen this at a school and the effects are stunning. The artwork is unbelievably good - the whole place is just a joy to be in. 

Here's hoping I can come back sometime for some more poetry / storytelling / writing fun. 

Thank you everyone at Aston, you made me feel extremely welcome.

Hawthorn Primary School

If you ever want to start the day with a good old laugh, I would recommend spending five minutes in the reception area of Hawthorn Primary School in Birmingham just before school starts. That was where I was yesterday and it was hilarious! First, one boy came in with his mum shaking out a very wet looking lunchbox. Seems his juice had exploded at the sight of his sandwiches, leaving a soggy, damp mess swishing around in there. That was followed shortly after by a great little sketch...

Brother 1: Mum, mum, he's got different trainers on!
Mum:        What?
Brother 1: He's got different trainers on! Honestly, he has!
Mum:       Go and get him.

Brother 1 runs off, returning shortly after with little brother in tow...Mum looks at little brother's feet where he has evidently got one new shoe and one old one on.

Mum:  Oh my word, he has! How've you done that?

Conrad starts to laugh. Mum turns to him.

Mum:  I bought him new shoes in the holidays, but they're just like his old ones. Oh how has he managed to do that?
Little brother:  Look! One's shiny...and one isn't.

It was great. Really a nice way to start the day. I was helping the children begin their poetry week, and it was a fab day. After an assembly (where I nearly knocked myself out on the low door frame  - something I had to look out for throughout school as it didn't appear to have been made for those of us who stand at 6ft 2!) of poetry, I moved to each class helping the children come up with brand new poems. Being a BSL (British Sign Language) school, the actions for many of the poems were ready made. I now know how to sign 'fantastic' (fist into palm with thumb sticking up), thank you (palm from chin outwards towards the person you're thanking) and some other words too.

The teachers were brill - really involved and quite obviously extremely fond of their classes. Everyone made me feel welcome and appreciated, and it was a happy day. Here are a couple of the poems that were made yesterday by the children...

Dad's Pants

My dad's got horrid undies
They're big and vibrant pink
But worse than that, you see,
His undies really stink!

They smell like rotten cabbage
His undies sure are grim
My mum keeps trying to hide them
In the garbage bin

I give my nasty neighbour
Dad's disgusting pants
Then watch him turn bright green
And quickly move to France!

Written by Y3


Crocodile in the Loo

Don't go into the toilets
Don't go into the loo
There's something hiding there
Waiting just for you

He has got sharp teeth
And a massive belly
It goes wibble wobble
Like a bright green jelly

He has great big eyes
Staring straight at me
I want to run away
I cannot do a wee

I turn around and scream
I really want my mum
The crocodile gets me
And bites me on my bum!

Written by Y1


Aren't they brilliant? And then, right at the end of the day, I was given this by Humzah in Y3. What a poet!!!!


My house is
Amazing
Amazing as you
There's a place for
privacy
A bath tub too
A place to sleep,
Quietly,
well that's a bed.
A lovely tiled kitchen
Full of sweets
and bread
My garden's full of flowers
A swing and slide too
A place to play
Football
Basket ball
too!

By Humzah.

Fantastic! There were some brill drawings to go with the poem, but my phone doesn't want to load them up for some reason.

Thanks to everyone involved in the day - hopefully I'll see you again sometime.

Conrad

 

High Bank

A little while ago I went to High Bank School. What a great day. In fact, it was so great, I thought I'd let the head teacher, Mrs Summers, and some of the children, tell and show you all about it...

Well, what a very special day we had at High Bank School when Conrad Burdekin came to visit.  Our day started with a whole school assembly and Conrad was so funny and engaging that we all managed to learn a poem, with actions, in just a few minutes.  Some of us even managed to perform it without laughing!

Conrad then visited every class in turn and provided a tailor-made workshop for each age group.  His interaction with the children was perfectly judged and the children were completely entranced and enthralled by his creative and quirky approach to story-telling.  Conrad’s teaching style included storytelling, poetry and drama and the children absolutely loved it.  The workshops not only inspired some excellent writing from the children, but also sparked some very innovative ideas from our teachers. 

Reading is one of our school priorities and our families don’t always have the money to buy books. So, as a school we decided to end the day by giving all the children one of Conrad’s books to take home to read.  Conrad took the time to sign every book with a special message for each child.  He also gave us some of his books to put in our school library.  The children were so delighted and I’m sure this helped to make the day one which they will never forget. 

 What our children thought!

Our teachers do not pick their noses, especially Mrs Summers!  Jodie Year 6

Thanks for coming and being cool, everyone loves you at our school.  Dylan Year 6

Thank you for signing all our books, of poems about children, teachers and stuff.  Amaal Year 6

I like poems more because of you, especially ones about teachers on the loo!  Sarah-Jane Year 5

Who knew that poetry could be such fun, especially when you rhyme bum with sun!  Jamie Year 5

Amaal in Year 6 was so inspired by Conrad he went straight home and drew a portrait of ‘his

BIKE-OETRY

 

 

So...it is finished! I did it! 52 miles, on my bike, in my full cricket kit, with a bag on my back that weighed nearly 10kg, around 10 schools. And I want to say a HUUUUUUUUUGE thank you to all of you guys. Without you, it just wouldn't have been possible. So many people have sponsored me because they loved the idea not only of cycling in my cricket kit, but also because I was involving schools and promoting poetry. My brother asked me last night what my highlights and lowlights were. There were many highlights, and happily, only one low light (riding 4 mph up a steep hill on some estate somewhere DESPERATE for the loo!).

 

So, here are the highlights...

 

I started 630am riding to my mum's and back for a coffee - I had to do some extra miles as the school route wasn't long enough  in itself to make 50 miles. Coming back home from mum's was interesting - lots of highschool children waiting for buses and finding it HIGHLY amusing that some bloke was riding past on his bike in his cricket kit.

Then it was onto Silcoates, my old stomping ground. And what a reception! I got to play cricket with the pupils and the head (keep trying Adrian...you'll bowl me out one day!). I was also presented with a limerick by Mr Jo Pigott. Take a bow, Jo...

 

Conrad's love and devotion to cricket

Extends beyond defending his wicket

With his poems and smiles

He'll cycle fifty miles

So some support would be just the ticket

 

Brilliant or what?! I was then afforded a guard of honour, riding down the very paths I used to walk along as a pupil, to great cheers and clapping.

The route on to Holy Trinity in Ossett meant cycling UP Low Laithes. If you've never seen that hill, it's a beast. But it was worth it cos at Holy Trinity I got smuggled in to the back of the hall mid assembly. The reaction of the lady playing the piano was priceless. As she saw me, her tune simply faded out as her mouth widened !

And Abigail's winning poem was fab. A poem about a teacher scratching her bum is always a good idea!

A long ride then over to Streethouse, where I suffered the ignominy of being overtaken by an eighty year old. 'Bit early for cricket, lad' he laughed as he flew by me. Streethouse also let me ride my bike in the hall, and there I got to hear Ben's awesome football poem and Steven Gerrard rhyme. A quick bottle refill, a (much needed) use of the facilities, then off to St Giles, via the railway line where I had a selfie, batting on the empty tracks. I know I often play down the wrong line (cricketing terminology for missing the ball when you're batting, to all you non-cricketing dudes), so I thought I'd do a pictoral reference of that.

St Giles' children evidently couldn't wait for me to actually get IN their school, so came to meet me on the road side with a cup of water, a banana, LOTS of smiling faces and TWO poems. Madaline's winning poem about her neighbour's stinky feet was brill, and the spring poem from the other little girl was lovely (sorry, I can't remember your name?!) - please send a copy of the Spring poem as I don't have one.

I had no time to pause, it was on to Redhill Juniors. How great were they?! Waiting in the playground for me, cheering and whooping, and holding up a sign that said 'Good Luck Conrad!' After hearing a great simile poem (was it Eden? I forget - I think so. Please send a copy!), Savannah presented me with two homemade biscuits that she had made. Note to self - when wearing a cricket helmet with a grill, take said helmet  off before trying to greedily stuff the whole biscuit in your mouth! At least it made the children laugh! Next it was Glasshoughton Infants - and there I got to ride right into a classroom!!!!! That was a first for me. Miller's poem about his dad was funny and moving - a really really great poem and a very proud young man when I told him he, like all the other winners, would be getting a copy of my new book before anyone else in the country.

 

Off then to Three Lane Ends who, delightfully, had a sandwich, salad, bun, and banana waiting for me. After listening to Ryan's winning poem in the playground (and wasn't he chuffed?! His reaction when his friends ran up to him to tell him he'd won was pricelesss - he just danced around the playground, punching the air. It was awesome!) I got a few minutes in the staff room to eat lunch, have a coffee, and ponder the fact that I had to get back on my bike. By this time I was hurting somewhat. My bike was peering at me from the corridor, daring me to saddle up.

And saddle up I did, all the way to Altofts Juniors. 'We couldn't pick a winner,' they told me, 'so we've got six!' Good news for me, I got to sit and relax whilst listening to six poems - please send them Fi, and I'll choose a winner. As I rode off I heard the secretary saying 'how does he ride in those cricket gloves?' 'How, indeed, love,' I thought, as I contemplated another 9 miles before home.

Ledger Lane was my penultimate school. Whilst I waited in the playground I heard a little voice shouting. It was a boy on a scooter in nursery. Here's what the conversation went like.

3 year old:    What are you doing?

Me:                Riding my bike.

3 year old:    It's a playground, not a field. You shouldn't be doing that.

Me:                The teacher said I could.

3 year old:    Well you shouldn't.

Me (sheepishly):    Sorry...

 

At that point I was rescued by Year five, and in particular Ashley, who performed her (rather aptly themed, given the recent encounter I'd had with said three year old) poem 'Nursery'. Teacher-destroyers, Ashley said. Conrad-destroyers, I said!

 

And then, oh bliss, my last school. Stanley St Peter's. The school that my daughters go to. And wow! I arrived in reception, tired, sweaty, in need of a lie down... And there, like an oasis of plenty, stacked up on the secretary's table, there was...

 

A congratulations card

A can of red bull

A boost

A bottle of lucozade

A bottle of water

 

As I rode down the corridor and into the assembly hall, all I could think of was how quickly I would devour all that stuff. Thanks Stanley, they were great! And thanks Mrs Preston, for keeping all your troops so well in order. It was lovely to hear the two runner up poems and Oscar's winning poem. Copies please!

 

And that was it. Ice creams all round in the playground (somehow I managed NOT to get one???!!!) and then...

 

A rest?

 

A lie down?

 

Bed?

 

Nope - tea to make for the girls, tidy up, wash the dishes (broken dishwasher...ugh) and THEN a bath. A most magnificent, bubbly, hot, wonderful bath. Then a HUUUUUGE amount of salty crisps, delicous chocolate, sugary sweets. And finally bed.

Thank you all SO much. Without you and your schools I just couldn't have done it. Thank you for all the money you donated, all the kindness you showed me, and all the enthusiasm you brought. Yesterday was one of my favourite days of all time. Alice told me last night I should think about my sponsored bike ride with pride. And I do. And I will, for a long long time.

The official total has come in at £1425, almost double what I raised when I swam a mile in my cricket kit in 2013. You guys are a very big reason that that is the case.

 

 

Right - off to Barnsley to do a day of storytelling. Not quite sure how I'm going to do that...!!!!

 

Conrad

Tong High Performance Poetry Competition

I spent a FANTASTIC couple of hours up at Tong High School this evening. Five schools, 143 children, hundreds of grownups, and some BRILLIANT performance poetry from said children. It made my heart sing, my hands clap, my feet tap, and my brain fizz. Well done well done well done to all of you who were a part of it. Here's hoping we can do it all again next year - more schools, more children, more grownups, more poems!!!! (And, if so, probably more space and a new venue as we were already pretty full up there tonight!).