POEM FROM JESSICA

This is a poem sent to me by a Y3 girl called Jessica. Thanks Jessica! So... her it is...

MY FUNNY BUNNY

I've got a bunny who is very funny
He likes to be out when it's sunny
His teeth are long and his legs are short
That's why my bunny is funny!


Round of applause for Jessica please! And Jessica, keep on writing poems. They're good for the soul!

BADSWORTH J AND I and sheep that are blue!

Badsworth Junior and Infants School very kindly hosted me on Monday, and I was VERY well looked after by the delectable Mrs Laycock (nee Bunting, and still the name I want to call her whenever I see her!). I spent the whole day in her Year 3 class and what a pleasure they were to work with. Funny, enthusiastic, and, best of all, creative. Some of the threats in our 'Wars of the Roses THREAT FACTOR' were genius. I was also very chuffed to receive a poem and a picture from Bradley the following day, courtesy of Mrs Laycock, who popped in after work. When I get my scanner working I'll post the picture Bradley drew, but for now here's the poem. It's brill, and it's one he made up in the playground on Monday whilst I chatted with the other children and Mrs Laycock shivered uncontrollably in the cold...


A POEM ABOUT A BLUE SHEEP

A sheep in a heap went to the loo
And got turned blue
He went to the zoo
And did not get fed
And died in bed
With a red head


Written by Bradley 13/12/10

Thanks so much Bradley! I loved it! And the googly eyes on your drawing are brill. I've read the poem to Alice, my four year old, and she keeps saying 'read it again, Daddy, read it again.'

BUYING MY BOOK!

Well, thanks to a rather creative and very clever man called Danny (www.dannycope.com), my book is now available to be bought online. Hurray! So, the Hungrumptious Blumpfh is online and ready to be bought. Just need to get people to come and buy it. Although the first print run has done well...over 1000 copies sold since July and now onto my second run. Who would have thought it? Not me in my wildest dreams!

GSAL Christmas Fair Poetry Contest

Well done to all who entered the poetry contest this weekend outside Santa's Grotto at Rose Court. It was tough to choose a winner, but I have! I have also highly commended another poet for an outstanding shape poem. His name is James Hardy from Year 3. Well done James, and unlucky. You only JUST missed out on winning the Maltesers!

Here is James' poem. It looks better in real life as he's written it within a drawing of a rat. Great shape poem!

I scuffle through rubbish all night long
I'm scrumfatlus to cats
I am black as coal and swift and speedy and hard to catch
I have big brainy brain


However, the winner, and proud owner (soon to be delivered) of a box of Maltesers, is MILLY MACKENZIE from 2W for her brilliant nature poem. Here it is...

I went to the woods
and I saw a great tree
it was once a little seed and now
it is a great big hump of leaves


The description of a tree being 'a great big hump of leaves' did it for me. Brilliant!

Fussy Eating

This poem was posted to me today, by none other than 9 year old Alice - you may remember her as second place in the poetry competition I ran at Wrenthorpe Methodist Church the other weekend. Well done Alice, it made me chuckle. And I feel sorry for your mum - I know JUST what it is like to have fussy eaters for daughters. And yes, they do generally seem to win!

Here's the poem...

I am a fussy eater
because I don't eat peas
carrots make me queasy
and broccoli makes me sneeze

we fight like mad at mealtimes
but I'm aloud to win
because mum knows I'll eat
anything if it comes in a tin.

Busy busy busy!

Well, here beginneth a couple of rather busy weeks for yours truly. Lots of exciting things coming up though, starting with a Gifted and Talented day up at South Milford tomorrow. I've not been there for a couple of years, but it's one of my favourite schools. The staff there have always been really supportive of me, and I seem to remember the lunches are pretty decent too! I'll also be doing a poetry reading and book signing there. Good job really, as this weekend I received a delivery of 2030 of my poetry books. There is a large quantity of boxes in my attic at this point...

POETRY COMPETITION WINNERS!

After yesterday's poetry competition that I ran at the Wrenthorpe Methodist Church, here is the winning poem. I've also posted the poem that I chose for second place (I wasn't going to choose a second one, but it was such a close run thing that I felt it was only fair to). Thanks to Alice (my four year old) for her insightful comments on all the poems!

THE WINNING POEM...

Sweetys, sweetys as sweet as can be
Please buy a bag of sweetys for me.
A fruity one, a chocolatey one and marshallow too
It's a shame none of them are good for you!!!

By Aimee and Kacey


SECOND PLACE...

Bags are cool
Bags are great
Bags you can hold in any way

Girls bags
Man bags
Have an evening out bags

Purses and crossovers are lots of fun
Fashionable and girly
They make you glow in the sun

You need a bag every day
Every outfit
In every way.

By Alice (not my Alice, but the 9 year old Alice on the stall next to me yesterday!)


Well done to you girls, they were great poems! Keep writing, keep having fun.

Grumbling Grannies

After assembly today at a (hitherto unnamed) school, I made my way out to the playground, where a table had been set up for me to display my books for the parents. As I wandered over, I noticed 2 grannies sitting behind the table. Here's a transcript of our conversation...

Me: Oh, don't move ladies. I'll be fine on the end.
noticing one of my books in front of them...
Granny 1: We've been having a look at this.
Me: What did you think?
pause
Granny 1: I wasn't very impressed
Granny 2: No, she wasn't.
Granny 1: I like the flowers, and the wandering clouds.
Me: Oh dear. Well, everyone has their own opinion.
Granny 1: Yes, they do. They're all just so, so, so dumbed down. There's one - I shan't be able to find it now - but there's one...
Here it is. All about sick. Really.
Me: That's one that I'm really proud about. I really like the rhythm in it. Took me a long time to get that right.
Granny 1 as realisation dawns... Did you write this book?
Me Yes
Granny 1 Well, yes I can see that with the rhythm. But still...
Me thinking 'that's shocked you - finding out you're sitting next to the author after unwittingly slagging off his book!'

CONCLUSION: Five minutes later she came and bought a book, and said 'I told you he'd like it.'


What was she on? If I arrived at school with Wordsworth I don't think I'd get very far. I'm GLAD I write the sorts of poems children want to read. But it's a good job I haven't marketed my book to grannies - at least, not those two anyway.

Pyjama poetry

I can't tell you just how pleased (and at times - amazed) I am by how many books I am selling. I did a wonderful event tonight at Normanton All Saints Infants School - pyjama poetry - and sold about 40 books. I sold so many I ran out and had to promise delivery of some more over the next few days. It was brilliant, and the kids were so hyped up about coming to school in their pyjamas.

Not only that, but I'd already sold some in the playground after school at Horbury Bridge, earlier the same day! Every time I think 'that must be it - surely it won't keep going like this?' it just does! Thank you to everyone who bought one of my books today. I have loved writing in every single one.

The cover!

Poetry Pottiness!

Unbelievably, I have sold 400 books in the first two and half weeks of selling. Imagine that?!!! I never thought it would go so well. But it is doing, and I've still got 4 more schools to go before the holidays. But better even than that is the feedback. The kids genuinely seem to be enjoying what they are reading. And that is the highest praise for me. I have heard of children sitting in the playground, reading my book whilst all around them carries on as normal; children bringing their book to school the following day to read; children copying the drawings; children writing their own poems. It is absolutely brill! At Wombwell Park Street in Barnsley last week I did a poetry day with the children. Apparently the following day the Year 5 children illustrated the poem that we created together, and then had it judged by the head. I just love to hear things like that - I don't often get to see the finished article as I'm gone before it arrives. I guess I'm the facilitator, not the finisher! But it's wonderful for me to hear these stories. And the most incredible thing about it all is that I've done it myself. Well, that's not strictly true - without David my printer and designer; Lilian my illustrator, and Clare, my wife, I'd not be where I am now. But it's come about because of me. So well done me!!!

How it feels

So, how does it feel having my own book in my hand and selling it to others?

In all honesty, it feels better than I could ever have imagined. I can't tell you how wonderful it has been seeing people walking away with my book, reading the poems and coming to tell me which ones they liked. I never imagined I'd actually be at this point, and yet here I am, feeling confident, proud and excited.

So far, particular favourites seem to be 'Sick Sid', 'Hand in the Sand' and, 'Animals with Attitude' (thanks Phil - I like that one too.). I've had a mum of three suggest that our hilarity at 'Sick' is due to the change in perspective one gets of said vomit after raising three little ones! And, so far the best comment by miles, is from Rosie, my niece. When I asked her which poem she liked best, she said, without a hint of irony or sarcasm, 'About the Author' - the bio bit at the end of the book.

Classic!

Competition fever!

Two competitions, one outcome: fame, fortune, and prestige!

Well, not quite. One of the competitions is the World Cup Final, and if Spain and Holland manage to make it through their tricky semis to the final, this budding author will receive £513 from the very nice people at BETFAIR. And if they don't? Well, the very nice people from BETFAIR will give him his money back. Can't ask fairer than that.

But the more exciting competition is the one with my poem, 'Sick Sid'. It's been watched by getting up to 200 people now (or rather, 100 who have each watched it twice!) and it's looking good against some of the other competitors. Although having said that, the winner 2 months ago got over 4000 views, so some perspective is needed!

But with the competition and my book coming out, along with lots of people BUYING and READING my book, this little poet is feeling rather fab dabby dozy at the moment (particularly 'dozy' actually, as the girls were all up at 5 this morning!).

So, if you haven't already, please log on to www.smories.com/watch/sick_sid/

Twice!

Thanks muchly.

Con

THE HUNGRUMPTIOUS BLUMPFH

Well, my book is finally here. Or, should I say, my 1044 books are finally here. In lots of boxes in the dining room. They look ACE (the books, not the boxes) and I'm already out there getting them sold - much thanks to my twin brother for acting as my marketing manager!

It's very exciting and slightly bewildering seeing all those books that I've made come into being (with the VERY able help of Lilian my illustrator, and David my printer, designer etc. etc. extraordinaire).

So...if you want a look, wait for it and go to my website. Something should be up shortly.

Cheers for now, and if you want one, just let me know!

Smories

One of my poems from my new poetry book has made it to the last 50 in an online competition. 'Sick Sid' will be read (and filmed) by a child and posted on the website at the beginning of July. When that has happened it will be available to be viewed by ANYONE for the whole month. At the end of the month, the story that has been viewed the most times will win $500. So come on everyone, help me to win this thing!

Just go to http://www.smories.com/ and look for my story - it will be on the home page from July 1st - every time you go on the stories change places, so you'll have to hover over them to find mine. It's the one called 'Sick Sid'. Watch it, get your friends to watch it, get EVERYONE to watch it!

Nearly There

The book is almost finished! Proof 2 has had my beady eye survey it in its entirety (i.e. I've looked over it to see if there are any mistakes - there were - they were almost ALL mine), and once it's gone back to be fixed by David, it's ready to be printed. Which is good really, considering that I will be taking it into schools at the beginning of July. Very very exciting times at the moment. Yippee!!!!

Nearly Finished

The book is nearly done! I've seen a first proof and it's looking good. It's also now got a title: 'The Hungrumptious Blumpfh and other poems'.

It's all very exciting. I'm booked in to take my book to several schools in July, and hopefully to lots more in the coming academic year. I'll be selling / signing / reading / workshopping my way around as many schools as poss.

More details soon! It's a busy old time what with going into schools, putting together my book, and collecting panini world cup stickers (!!!)

The book, The book!

So...I have finally done it - collected my best poems together, passed them on to an illustrator, and asked her to do some drawings. Once they are done, it's all going to a printer, and my first book will be done, ready to sell in schools. So...any school type people reading this - if you'd like a look, do get in touch! It's a mixed feeling of excitement and nerves that greets the thought of publication. Will it be liked? Will it sell? My name will be on the front!

Ancient Egyptians and buckets for sick

I was working in a school today, and one of the boys in a class started to cry and was passed a bucket in case he was going to be sick. I naturally assumed that he was not feeling very well and continued on with my lesson.

Only to find out later in the day...

He'd been fine until I'd started talking about the mummification process, specifically the part where a hook was inserted in a dead person's nose to extract the brain. Apparently that had suddenly make him feel rather unwell. Goodness! I didn't realise that my description could have that effect - needless to say I felt rather bad about it afterwards.

Here's hoping that he's now feeling better and that my Ancient Egypt workshops don't have similar effects in the future!

Lads 'n' dads

Before half term, I ran a lads n dads day at Normanton All Saints Infant school. What wonderful, chaotic, creative fun we had! Boys from Foundation up to Year 2 brought their dads along to have a day of writing and storytelling. After five minutes being surrounded by 20 plus excitable boys, I was wondering what on earth I'd let myself in for. By the end of the day, however, we'd had so much fun, and everyone had enjoyed themselves so much, that I'm going to launch lads n dads across the region (or at least try!). So thanks to Normanton All Saints for their help and support in this brill project.

I've just finished reading My Sister Jodie by the wonderful Jacqueline Wilson. And I think it's second only to The Illustrated Mum. What a brilliant book it has been. I've been reading it in the bathroom, at the breakfast table and, tonight, in front of the (not switched on) TV, which shows just how good it must have been!

Books like this make me clutch them to my chest afterwards and want to immediately speak to other people who have read the same book. I had a few minutes just quiet, thinking about the magnificence of what I'd read, and then I phoned Rosie, my 11 year old niece, and the person who had lent me the book. Her favourite character was Jodie (no surprise there, I don't reckon, as she is sort of like Jodie in a wild kind of way), but I think Pearl and Harley were my favourite two.

I love books, and when I read one like this, one that moves me, one that I know will stay with me, I am so grateful for the joy that a book can bring. Oh it sounds over the top, but this is how I feel! I'm wondering if others feel this way? Or is it just me? Let me know!